Imagine for a moment that it’s a beautiful winter morning and there’s fresh pristine snow on the ground. You walk up to a hill with your sled, and slide down and take your first trip and get to the bottom. This first time, your course was pretty random, right? Then, you walk back up to the top of the hill once more and you sled down again. Okay, the odds are you’re going to hit some of the grooves you created from the first time you came down. So you do it again and again and again and by the end of morning, you’re likely to have carved a pretty strong little track, ensuring that you head down the same path and wind up at the same place every time. Does that make sense?
Exactly the same thing happens with our thoughts and our brains. In science this is called ‘Neuro-plasticity”. We have spent years and years thinking the same thoughts over and over again, based on past circumstances and experiences – and most of them are not even our thoughts! And we have grooved these thoughts so strongly, that when something happens in our life, these thoughts automatically get triggered and then our old patterns play themselves out. Just like good old tracks the sled follows down the mountain.
And so we tell the same old story, over and over, about why we have our childhood wounds, and how bad our previous relationship was, how we got dumped, how we’re not being loved the way we want to, how unequal this relationship is, how we have these abandonment issues, how they cheated on us, how I’m too old to find love, too fat, too skinny, too white, too black, too gay, too straight, too poor, too rich, too unstable, too unreliable, afraid of commitment, too demanding… Blah, blah, blah. PLEASE STOP!
The more you tell the same old story the more you’re perpetuating it in your experience. Why? Because you keep focusing on it. Remember, we live in an universe where everything is created twice, first in the non-physical, then in the physical. The more you focus on telling the old story, the more you’ll be attracting circumstances and experiences that will sustain and perpetuate your old story. The more you tell the old story, the more you’re blocking love from coming into your life.
So what is the solution? You’ve got to put a road block on the sled path. Stop telling the OLD story and start telling the NEW story! The NEW story of how you want it to be. The story of what it’s like to be in the most magical, loving relationship with your Soulmate. Starting now. You’re going to start catching yourself when you’re chatting with friends and the OLD story starts to creep out. Notice it. Then shift to the NEW story.
You can try what I did when I first started embodying this idea. I would say something like…
“Oh! Well that’s my old story. The new story is… that I’m no longer subject to those old patterns I had in my previous relationships. I’m working on myself, I’m changing my perspective and I’m starting to feel optimistic about my love life. I am a quality guy, and I have enjoyed the contrast that my previous relationships have brought me. And I’m now ready, open, and available to meet my Soulmate. I know he is out there, and right this moment he’s also thinking about meeting someone just like me. I know that no matter what I cannot screw it up. We are destined for each other, and though we haven’t met yet, I know he and I are already connected energetically. The desire to be with him would not have been placed inside of me, unless God wanted me to experience this level of Soulmate love. I know that when we come together it will be unlike any relationship I’ve ever experienced. It will feel just right. I can’t wait to be in his arms, to make love to him, to take weekend trips with him, and to grow with him. I can’t wait to share all the many gifts I will be bringing to the relationship. Knowing that he is out there allows me to feel confident, to date with freedom, and inspires me to be myself!”
It might feel weird at first, almost as if you’re faking it, but don’t let that stop you. The more you tell the NEW story, the better you’ll FEEL, and the quicker he or she will show up in your life.
What about you? What is your NEW story?
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