The majority of people live a life of quiet resignation. We do what our family, friends, and society expect us to do. We follow the path others have laid out before us and do our best to become successful. We work hard and put in all the necessary hours. All this, only to find ourselves feeling as if we are living someone else’s life and not the one we once dreamt about.
I believe this happens because we spend very little time thinking about, exploring, and feeling into what I believe are life’s four most important decisions. Give each one of these decisions the time, energy, and effort they genuinely require and get ready to experience a meaningful change in your current level of satisfaction.
Life’s 4 Most Important Decisions
Decision #1: Who you want to be
There’s great power in choosing who you want to be in this life instead of letting others decide that for you. Ask yourself, “Who would I love to be? What kind of person would I love to become? What are the qualities or virtues that I’d like to develop? How do I want to be known and remembered by others?”
Decision #2: What you want to do
What cause, activity, or project would you love to dedicate your life to? What do you feel naturally drawn to that you’d like to master? Is there something you do that comes easily to you to create a business around it or get highly paid to do it? Deciding what to put your energy into will help you stop engaging in all those activities wasting your precious life force.
Decision #3: Where you want to live
The place you live in will often determine your life’s direction, the people you’ll meet, and the experiences you’ll have. If you’re going to live somewhere for ten years, you owe it to yourself to spend enough time thinking and exploring what is it that makes this place ideal for you. Ask yourself, “What kind of place would I love to live in? What kind of environment will inspire me to be the most creative, joyful, and loving version of myself?”
Decision #4: Who you want to be with
Get clear about the kind of people you’d like to surround yourself with. Determine their qualities, values, and worldview. If you want to be in a romantic relationship, ask yourself, “What are the qualities I’m looking for in a partner?” If you are already in a relationship and you don’t see yourself marrying this person, let them go so you can create space for someone who is a better fit for you.
It has nothing to do with feeling deserving…
If you’re thinking, “Yes, Gabriel, I know all of this, but I just don’t feel deserving or worthy of having what my heart is longing for. Besides, I don’t know how to get out of the life and relationships I’ve already created. I might as well resign and accept this is the best I’ll ever get…”
… then, here’s what I’d like you to know:
It has nothing to do with feeling deserving.
Let me explain.
Many of my clients now living the lifestyle, relationships, and careers they chose don’t feel deserving either. I hear many of them often say, “I sometimes feel like an impostor and unworthy of having all of this.”
Here’s the ultimate truth:
They have what they have now because one day, I invited them to dream bigger and commit to going after what their hearts were longing for. They made a choice about who they wanted to be, who they wanted to be with, where they wanted to live, and what they wanted to do.
And they made a commitment.
I’m inviting you to do the same because it all starts with the quality of the choices you start making today and the baby steps you begin to take.
Who do you want to be? What do you want to do? Where do you want to live? Who do you want to be with?
Investing time, energy, and perhaps even money in answering these questions is your first step in creating the life, relationships, and career your heart is secretly dreaming of.
If you’d like to partner with a coach who can help you answer these questions and make these important decisions, I’m available for individual coaching. You can learn more here.
From my heart to yours,
Gabriel Gonsalves
Photo by Unsplash
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